Feel of marriage
Last night I had a dream about John and I before we got married. In it, I was being my usual skeptical self, questioning everything, questioning our relationship. We met each other so young, how can we possibly know that we should be together, we’re supposed to go out and be wild on our own – that kind of thing. I said this to John and to my dismay, he was convinced by my arguments. He immediately decided to up and leave and found a job in a city far, far away. Right before he left, I realized what an absolute idiot I had been and burst into the most all-consuming of tears, realizing I would have to live without him, realizing I had just made the worst mistake of my life. Then I woke up. I reached through the warm blanket to find John and wrapped my arm across his chest. This stirred him enough that he sleepily asked ‘you okay?’ I told him I had a bad dream and then easily drifted back to sleep. Maybe marriage does feel different, in a really good way.